Fear Less, Love More

Someone wise told me recently: “You are either moving toward fear; or you are moving toward love.”

I like this. And what’s more, I can tell the difference. I can feel it in my body, right in the pit of my stomach. When I am moving toward fear, when I am letting fear be my primary motivation, I feel: tense; stressed; and paralyzed. I feel, in short, absolutely awful.

When I am moving toward love, on the other hand, I feel an expansive sense of hope, I feel open and curious, and I feel supported by the world. It seems that everything goes my way, even when it doesn’t go the way I expect.

Fear can be very tempting. When I am worried and anxious, somehow I get to a place where I am convinced that my fear is keeping me safe. It isn’t. In fact, I think I am more proactive in dealing with situations as they arise if I am receptive and optimistic.

Now, one caveat: I realize that there are things to worry about. I don’t advocate letting what’s important fall by the wayside. But spending 100% of our time acting out of fear—based on what we don’t want—drains life of all its zest and magic. (For more thoughts on worrying about the right things, see Chris Guillebeau’s blog post here).

So my goal is to use worry more selectively, and to train my sights on what I do want. I will head towards love. Better yet, I will use love as jet fuel to blast me towards my dreams. And I start today.

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